I tried to delicately express these things to the minister and in his wisdom, what I left unsaid, I think he was able to work out for himself. At the funeral service, when speaking of Ted’s life, the minister moved through my relationship with Ted with the utmost sensitivity and although I had steeled myself not to cry at the service, I broke down and wept. I suppose it was at that funeral service the reality of Ted’s death began to take hold of me. Before that, I had intellectually known Ted. "Wait," I said, "what just happened?" I..." Ellen ran a finger along her lips. "I guess I just gave her someconfidence? Maybe this whole time that was all she ever needed?" I just hope this isn't all some terrible mistake." I laughed."Well, isn't that basically what we said before coming here in thefirst place?" she smiled and looked down at the device. "And it hasn'tturned out so bad if you ignore that stupid mix up earlier." True." I looked around at the relative peace and order within. I was in a shock and heaven. It was a mixed reaction for me ..then after 10 to 15 seconds, I calmed down and took mom to bed. There we had a beautiful conversations at first, she told to feel comfortable and don’t think that we are doing a sin so that we can enjoy and said these things must be as a secret and must not be revealed and I nodded for everything. She told to close the door and increase the volume of the tv such that no one can hear our moans, then the first move started by my mom. He found out only the male clothes thedemon left behind, without identification documents. He dressed and wentto Illana's home, only to find it locked. He ended up sleeping in thestreets and without money he started to drink heavily to forget thehunger. It was a wonder that he survived so much time after this.>From one side I was relieved only by thinking that this would be theoutcome in my case if the Thuangduul?s monks didn?t intervene. I would wake upalone, in a female body, without knowing.
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